How To Embrace Our Perfect Imperfections
Perfection is unattainable, but by accepting what isn't perfect about ourselves, we can immediately connect with our inner universe and tap into our subconscious mind to reach for love. The love we were all created with.
To be honest, accepting my own imperfections has not been easy. Growing up I had to deal with the fact that I was the shortest kid everywhere I went. In the classroom I had to always be the first one on the line and I had to be seated right in front of the teachers so their eyes were right on me.
The name calling was a wide variety, I was called: The dwarf, Smurfette, the miniature one, teeny tiny, microscopic, minuscule. This arrange of names were just a small fraction of all the other names I was called because in addition to my short size, I also wore big glasses with thick lenses and when I lost my baby teeth my two front ones grew back first, so it made me look like a some sort of bunny with glasses. I was born with clubbed feet so I had to wear huge boots that had metal straps going up to my knees which made walking and running a challenge. I had to walk without bending my knees, so picture Frankenstein but 1,000 times shorter.
Yes, that was me as a little elementary school girl. The cruel attitudes, rejections, sinister stares, snickering and sometimes, the roaring cackles where enough for me to not want to go back to school, but I didn't have a choice, I had to go and survive the constant bullying, and Survive I did. Thankfully by middle school, my clubbed feet were cured, all of my teeth had grown back, and even though I still wore glasses, which is cool, I didn't need the thick lenses anymore. There was only one thing I couldn't change, my size. The name calling didn't stop. I was subject to even more bullying because of my stature, but this time I felt even worse because as a preteen I felt more aware of my appearance, given that acne started to show. I also felt like I lacked intelligence because my ADD was getting worse by the minute, even though I didn't know I had this condition at the time( it wasn't even a diagnose, years ago children who suffered from ADD were labeled as lazy kids, or the ones who just didn't behave.) My self image and my self worth were down in the dumps so to speak. This was reflected in my poor grades, my rebellious attitude and my constant depression. I couldn't stay at the same school for more than 4 or 6 months. My dear Mother went trough a lot trying to deal with all of that madness. I wounded up attending 13 schools between elementary ,middle and high school.
I finally saw the light at the end of the dark tunnel I was in (at least for my self-esteem), when I met a girl from my neighborhood, who suffered from a thyroid disorder, consequently she had a chronic weigh problem. In spite of her problem, she rejected all those poison filled comments that bullies would throw at her, by simply ignoring them and focusing on her strengths.
Seeing how confident she was ( and she still is, now she is happily married,has a 10 years old girl and she owns a business), gave me a new perspective. Slowly but surely, I started to love and accept myself. Gradually my outlook changed and I went from focusing on my shortcomings and imperfections to seeing myself in the light of love and self worth. This new way of thinking resulted in opportunities to take advantage of my small size and the ability to take on challenges( that comes as a positive side effect of ADD).
While in the last year of high school, one day a classroom door was locked from the inside, there was an small interior window slightly opened so I volunteered to get in and open the door while inside the classroom, everyone cheered on and to show their appreciation a group of kids, including some of the bullies invited me to a party that weekend, it felt great to be appreciated, but that reaction wasn't caused because I opened the classroom door. It was because of the way I saw myself and because I had started to embrace being small framed and I accepted me the way I am. I snapped out of my self deprecating state of unworthiness, concentrated in my studies and finally I was able to graduate from high school and then I enrolled in college to study journalism. I dropped out of college when my mother passed away, but I made the decision to come to the USA to study English and to make a life for myself. Along the way I had continued to evolve by accepting and loving myself, therefore I have being able to build a family, because I can give love.
Loving ourselves also mean not letting others put us down, we can also walk away lovingly, when others simply don't love themselves and as a consequence, they can't give love.
Having self love and respect has been the number one factor to grow as a person who wants to do better in life. I want to become a person who contributes to society. By loving and caring for myself I can give my best to everyone around me and love them an accept them with their perfect imperfections.
If you are struggling with feelings of inferiority because of past or present attacks or snarky comments from other people, see those people with compassion and love. I say this because in my experience, I learned that those attacks are a mirror to their own hearts and minds. My mother always told me to ignore disheartening comments or attitudes from others and she also used to state "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." Nowadays, I reflect on those wise words and I am absolutely sure that love is the answer to our sorrows and self lacerating thoughts.
See yourself as a teacher that guides people, especially those who hurt you, to love and accept themselves by doing so yourself first.
In the end, embracing and accepting our own faults will lead us to a path of opportunities and a more enriched life. A life worth living.
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